Hi, everyone, I’m Saralyn Hodgkin. And this is the podcast to practice your leadership.
Self Care is a term that I’m hearing a lot and one that angers me and excites me. What a way to start a about self care. Self care has been a term that has been sewn together in a way that means pampering and indulgence and spa days, and it’s so flippant, and that’s not how I see self care. I see self care as a form of resilience building, I see self care as a pretty righteous act, one that dares people to challenge the flippantness that I require in order to refuel myself and show up as a parent, to refuel myself to show up as a lover, a partner, a community member, a colleague, a coach.
It’s, it is a requirement for me to figure out and constantly reflect on what does self care mean for me, what do I need? Audre Lorde, who was a self described black lesbian mother warrior poet, who dedicated her energy, love, life, leadership to confronting such significant injustices in our time. You can Google her and be inspired by her. She, from my understanding, and y’all, you can always correct me on this. My understanding is that she’s one of the people who coined the term self care and it was not about massages and flippancy, and some of the things that maybe we could say the healthcare industry, turned it into, maybe that’s too controversial, I don’t know.
But when Audre Lorde defined self care, it was about caring for myself, as she said, caring for myself, not as a place of self indulgence, but for self preservation. She talked about caring for herself, as self preservation, as an act of political warfare. And when I look at that, and I stand in that definition, I find it really important for me to look at, you know, when I hop on my peloton, I am looking at myself and my refueling and my resilience. I’m sweating it out, I’m releasing, I’m healing. I’m standing in, in this year of Yes, as Shonda Rhimes calls it, that have positive narratives that bring me to tears and helped me integrate parts of myself that I wouldn’t be able to access without carving out this space.
It’s, one of the instructors there, her name is Robin Arsalan, and her handle on Instagram is at Robin NYC, what she talks about is movement as medicine. I’m sure many people talk about movement as medicine. And here I am on a bike, music blaring, positive narratives blaring, and I’m using my body to be held in movement in a way that I couldn’t access. In a way that’s healing my wounds, in a way that’s integrating my, my owies. All these places and ways because it is medicine. And if I saw it as self indulgent -Oh, I wouldn’t have time, I’ve got to feed the kids. I’ve got to do this. I get it.
No, no, no, this is a required moment. This is a required moment. And so for me creating my self care plan, which I reflect on quite regularly, what’s working for me and what’s not, you know, sometimes I go through significant focus on meditation, and then I just pop out of it. And now I’m on a peloton sweating and that’s a form of meditation. Like it’s, it’s not about just creating one path, it is for me about reflecting on what’s needed now because my life changes, my needs change. And my self care practices that lead me in my resilience is what is required so that I can show up and be who I want to be.
So I look at my physical stuff and my sleeping and my how am I? How am I getting rest? How am I drinking enough water? All that kind of stuff, I look at my emotional stuff and looking at self compassion, listening to my inner narratives. I’m looking at how I’m setting boundaries so I can connect socially or looking at what places I find fun in order to enliven me, I connect in spiritually to be able to have time alone to be able to put my feet in the grass, connect with trees, to be able to create my sacred spaces.
I have my own personal practices of journaling and self authoring my journey and figuring out the formations and the emergence of my identity and so on. I look at my finances and look at how I’m standing in my financial power. I look at my work I look at my space. There’s various sightlines to be able to see where I can cultivate the quiet, the gratitude, the support that I need from others for myself, because it is with self care practices that I can show up.
Nedra Tawwab, whose handle is @nedratawwab on Instagram, has a great post on I am practicing self care when I … sit in silence, set my Do Not Disturb, accept myself, forgive myself. What is it that you fill out? Can you write in your journal? I am practicing self care when I… What are you filling out? What does that look like for you? What does that space look like for you? Do your own work. Self care is required. Stay in the practice.
Thanks all, I’m Saralyn. You can find me at holonleadership.org. I walk alongside you as you practice your leadership.
